Time Flies When You're ... Busy




I think I have lost a year in the timeline of my life... one minute I was sat on my bed planning English, then before I knew it I am sat on my sofa planning maths.. in 2019. Can anyone tell me what happened to 2018?!

Seriously speaking, I know exactly what happened in 2018-2019. I didn't get hit by a football gone astray and suffer with amnesia - well, the football part actually happened but the only lasting effects was a bruise (both arm and ego).

In the October of 2017, the start of my NQT year, my relationship fell apart. 3 years in, the stress of life seemed to break us, we were both so swept up in the huge changes in our own lives that we forgot to keep investing in our life together. But these things happen, and I had 31 little faces watching me every day so I had to be strong (between 9-3, that is). Before you feel sorry for me - there is a happy ending coming, I promise. The first half of my NQT year was a horrible cycle of feeling like I was falling through each day as teacher, not knowing what was going on or if I was ever doing the right thing. However, the chaos that was my personal life just drove me to completely absorb myself in my career and strive to perfect everything that I was doing. In hindsight, this may not have been the healthiest option. I lived and breathed work, everywhere I looked was a lesson idea or a half-hour window to create a 'really useful' spreadsheet to track progress. It wasn't healthy and it took over my world. On the other hand, I learnt so much this way. I feel like I fast tracked my exposure to different techniques, theories and approaches, and for that I am grateful.

Meanwhile, what was actually happening was that I was learning to be stronger. I was learning to be OK with the idea that so many little lives were relying on me to be strong and in control. And if I could be strong and in control of other people, then I sure as heck needed to feel the same about myself. I was 22, single, employed in my dream career and doing damn well at it. I had bought myself a new car, was saving a healthy amount each month, going out with friends every week and had an incredible family around me. Life was way better than it felt at the time, in the NQT bubble.

Zoom forward to September 2018. New class of 29 little faces, I was back with my man (I promised it ended well) and we had just exchanged contracts on our first home together. Oh. My. God. What a whirlwind! It was so easy to lose track of time, but it was a good thing. I was finding out who I was, what I wanted and placing myself exactly where I wanted to be in life. As much as I hate clichés... it was true. Little did I know, buying my first home would shape me into a different kind of teacher, and one that I am glad I became.

But that is a story for another time.

You can't blame me for losing a year, right?

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